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Examples of Intergenerational Legacy Burdens 

ByJennifer Nurick
Examples of Intergenerational Legacy Burdens “We don’t do emotion. Suck it up” “We have to work until we almost kill ourselves” “It’s not safe to be seen, you need to hide” “Being different is unsafe” “You have to be perfect to be loved”

Some of the burdens that came through my lineage:

  • It’s unsafe to be seen
  • Children should be seen and not heard
  • You are not as important as the adults
  • Money is scarce
  • You should feel lucky when given the bare minimum
  • Women have less power than men

Some of these are not spoken about but are communicated clearly through what is praised and accepted in the family and what is looked down on, criticised or rejected.

What would you add to the list of intergenerational legacy burdens?

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Jennifer Nurick is a Master's-qualified Clinical Psychotherapist, attachment and trauma therapist and couples therapist with over 20 years in private practice. She helps adults and couples heal anxious and avoidant attachment, childhood trauma and recurring relationship patterns, drawing on IFS, EMDR and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Jennifer is the author of Heal Your Anxious Attachment (New Harbinger), host of the Psychotherapy Central Podcast and founder of Psychotherapy Central.

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