This is an oldie, but a goodie. This conversation was totally unprompted, she had no idea what I was going to ask her. How amazing is it that the first thing she says is tone and softness of voice! This …
Tag: Tips
Tips for Co-Regulation
Experiencing this kind of love in a relationship is deeply healing. It has the power to change an insecure attachment style to a secure one. Over time, you will learn to self-regulate and fill in the developmental gap you missed. …
A Tip For Arguments
When we build up resentments in a relationship it is common that they will come pouring out in the midst of an argument. You start with a complaint about how they leave their clothes on the floor, they become defensive, …
Tips for Being Assertive
TEXT The first step in being assertive is to know our needs. If we are uncertain about our needs, we will find others are too. We will find it challenging to communicate our needs, and when we do, we will …
How to Reduce Hypoarousal
When we are in hypoarousal, we have started to numb and dissociate. To help yourself when you are on this end of the spectrum, you need to stimulate the senses and get back into your body. One way to do …
How to Reduce Hyperarousal
Hyperarousal is when excessive energy is expressed as anxiety, panic, feeling out of control and wanting to run away. It is challenging to relax when this happens as our body has gone into fight or flight mode. It is difficult …
Statements of Self-Validation
HERE IS A QUICK ‘GO TO’ TILE FOR VALIDATING STATEMENTS. Keep these on your screen saver, print them, and put them next to your bed, where you brush your teeth. While we are changing our inner landscape, it takes a …
5 Tips to help you with Gaslighting at Work:
Gaslighting at work can ruin your confidence and career. I have seen it. The behaviour is easier to manage if other people in the office see what is happening. It is much more difficult when one person is singled out …
Anxiously Attached People Appreciate Reassurance
Feel free to share this with your partner! You are allowed to ask for reassurance – reassurance = safety. The most important thing about reassurance is that it is congruent and truthful. If you feel unsure about the relationship, it …
1 Simple Tool to Counter a Fight or Flight Trauma Response
SOMETHING TO DO EVERY DAY You might like to practice this exercise daily so you get used to the feeling of this breath. At first, it might feel strange, like you are straining. This is why it is good to …