Let’s expand the definition of trauma. Historically, we think of trauma as big events that caused stress and shock and impacted your old view of yourself and the world. This is big ‘T’ trauma. It has become more apparent that …
Tag: Healing
Healing Takes Time
Have you ever become frustrated with yourself on your healing journey? Thinking: Why are relationships still so difficult for me? Why do I still react like a child around my parents? Why do I still feel anxious all the time? …
11 Signs you are Growing Apart
Relationships take work. They need to be fed and nurtured in order to remain satisfying for both parties. Often the process of drifting apart is gradual. When we find ourselves growing apart, we need to decide if we are going …
Communicating Needs Without Losing it.
When we ask for something, we risk being and feeling rejected. We are vulnerable. To cover that vulnerability, many of us will use anger or force. How can I ask for what I need and hold onto the part of …
Humans are Wired For Connection
Have you ever felt the desire to connect, but felt sabotaged by another part of yourself that wants to protect? Both are compulsions. To desire to connect is human. We are wired for connection. When we have experienced trauma, we …
What We Imagine Growth To Be:
Have you ever been in the trap of imagining that when you have grown enough, everything in your life will be ‘perfect’? You will have the ‘perfect’ job, one that your sense of purpose is aligned with, and you will …
Dark Night of the Soul as an Existential Crisis
Where the Scaffolds Come Crashing Down Did you know that the origin of the phrase ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ is a poem written by a 16th-century Spanish mystic, St John of the Cross? In it, he talks about the …
What is Reparenting?
Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we have been raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or …
I Can’t Change My Attachment Style, Can I?
Up until the age of two, our brain is growing at a furious rate. The neurons are connecting, and the brain is being wired, literally. In the relationship with our primary caregiver (usually the mother), we are being wired for …
Is Your Attachment Style Affecting Your Relationships?
Your attachment style influences all of your intimate relationships. Knowing if you are secure or insecure in your attachment can help you to understand some of your behaviour when you are in relationships. Know that your attachment style CAN be …