I grew up with anxiety around me. It was in the air, in the voices of the adults around me. I know anxiety well. Anxiety still visits me when I have an interview, when I have to do a video …
Tag: psychotherapy
Reversing The Cycle of Anxiety
At its core, anxiety is worrying about something that MIGHT happen. We scan the environment for threats and gauge ourselves to see if we will be able to cope with the threat. When you feel your anxiety, you decide that …
The Power of ‘Parts’ Work
Parts work is used in MANY research-based psychotherapeutic modalities; EMDR, Schema Therapy, IFS (Internal Family Systems), Transactional Analysis, Gestalt, Narrative Therapy, and more. It is used in so many modalities because it works. I find that it creates a distance …
When You ‘Act Out’, It Might Be Your Inner Child Trying To Protect You
If it wasn’t safe to connect with your parents when you were a child, it makes sense that connecting with people as an adult will be scary to your inner child. One part of you might feel safe, but …
The Process of Reconnecting with your Needs.
If you grew up with a caregiver, who was not attuned to your needs, who put their needs before yours, over time, you learn to deny your needs. It can then be difficult to identify your needs as an adult …
Cyle Breakers Will Often Be Shamed In Their Family
There are many subtle ways the cycle breaker is shamed in the family; I hope the list above is helpful in spotting some of the behaviours. A big thank you to my Instagram community for adding to this list. …
Identifying Your Needs If You Are Avoidantly Attached
Have you ever marvelled at how some people seem to know exactly what they need at any given moment? Do you often feel numb and have no idea? This is one of the traits of the avoidantly attached. The avoidantly …
A secure Home Base
When I was training to be a psychotherapist, I was not taught about co-regulation. I was taught about theories, CBT, existential practice, narrative therapy, person-centred therapy. I mainly was taught to listen deeply. To become aware of the parts of …
The Dance of The Avoidant and The Securely Attached
Something I haven’t seen talked about anywhere else is the phenomenon where an avoidant will create an anxious attachment out of a normally securely attached person. Can this happen? Yes! I know because I have had this experience myself. I …
Are You a Cycle Breaker?
As a cycle breaker, it is common to get push back. Push back sounds like this: Do you think you are better than us? Why are you making such a fuss? You are so over-sensitive. Why do you always have …